Faith.
This is the part where I usually spiral.
I fear that because it hasn't happened yet, that it may never.
My thoughts grow dark.
I'm being seduced by my ego.
Drawing me in like a siren who knows my heart is still fragile.
I understand why it wants to draw me back
Comfort is its usual space.
But this time.
I was prepared.
I rehearsed what id5do if I got back here this time.
I rehearsed what I'd say.
I remembered what it'd feel like.
I reminded myself that this feeling is only temporary.
And that
On the other side of this
Is everything I asked for.
This is just the in between.
The unknown
The space I've given up every past version of myself for.
Now I'm here
Waiting patiently
For my exit
And my new beginning
With nothing but faith
As my guiding light.

Sometimes just knowing that you are strong enough is enough to make you strong enough. I felt this in my soul.